1.19.10

over the last few weeks, i have been asking myself how long it takes to really get to know someone. some might say a few weeks, some say a few months, others may say years. i realized it is completely unique from person to person and situation to situation. what really matters is how well you know the person you are with.
ask yourself - how well do you know the person you are with? by knowing them, i do not mean knowing what their favorite color is or knowing where their favorite place to vacation is. i mean really knowing them, being able to predict, know and understand their inner thoughts. it has been said that a person's eyes are the pathways to their soul. i don't know how true that is, unless a lot of people i know have invested in some good quality contact lenses.
let me explain: see, i have been through a rollercoaster of relationships/dating/life experiences where i thought i really knew the person i was with. i felt like i could see through them - i thought that nothing he could do would surprise me (at least not in a way that would be bad). i then realized that i should not be so naive, although this realization did not just come about on its own, it came to me after being cheated on/lied to/deceived. then it became clear - i did not know the person i was with at all. no one that i know on that level, no one that i have invested that much love, time, energy and effort into could do those things to me - it just seemed impossible. so i wondered, how did i not see the signs? it is because love is truly blind.
when in a situation that seems out of the ordinary because the other person is doing something that is unexpected, ask yourself how well do you really know them? then remember this: you have no control over how much you know about a person - all that you know is what they are willing to reveal.
being the control freak that i am, this is not something that i like, but it is something that i have found to be true. and in a world full of lies and deceit, the truth is like a breath of fresh air.